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-OFF OF ME!

[There is a faint clatter, followed by a sound almost like something was smooching her leg.]

Ugh... What are you?

[As familiars go, this was not one she expected to have to deal with. Even less so considering she had never seen one like it before in her life. And who the devil sent familiars to assault their enemies like this?]

Ah- [Oh hey, that thing turned on. Finally.]

And finally this device-

[Her words sounded almost scornful, although she tried to bite it back. There was no sense in alienating them yet. She couldn't let anyone know she was a Master.]

-decides to work. I almost thought it malfunctioning. Now, if someone would kindly give me an explanation as to why and how this ridiculous charade was set up? Your skills would have been better turned to more functional directions. I hope that you will realize the consequences of your actions soon.

[Her voice tightened, growing a little more ragged for a second. Where was he? Then it calmed, only rising into frustration again when a smooching sound followed.]

Someone get this thing off me. Now.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

The person who brought me here, of course.

[That one sounds almost... American. Young. Female. It's hard to tell what else.]

I have my suspicions.

Enlighten me.

Because I'm pretty sure if any one person brought you here, it's nobody you know.

I really see no reason to. After all, it's none of your business.

Suit yourself.

You'll figure out you're barkin' up the wrong tree sooner or later.

How insolent. Theories can be disproved easily enough. That doesn't make them insignificant.

_{[If it were video, she'd have smiled magnanimously and gestured to herself. Insolence, at your service!]

[But it isn't, so she just adopts a slightly smug tone.]}

It does when you've been here long enough to know that whatever the reason people are brought here, it sure ain't because of some personal grudge by some asshole in their world.

Just sayin'.

[...]

Oh my. How truly smart of you, to have the experience of longevity and yet to simply insult those who have not. Truly, you are a master.

[Her voice is utterly scorn-filled.]

If 'wrong' is an insult, you can charge me 'Guilty', Your Honor.

I don't take it back, though.

I'm hardly surprised. [Can her voice be any drier? ~~Probably.~~]

At any rate, I have no intention of indulging your impudence. The children of today are so badly brought up.

Aaaaall righty then, you can keep your head jammed up there and I'll just go on being badly-brought-up and right.

...

I will regret asking, but jammed up where?

_{[There's a long silence on the other end.]}

... Your ass.

I'm talking about your ass.

. . .

I'm neither flexible enough for that, nor interested in it. Now please desist from using such vile language around me.

If you WERE flexible enough, I'd be really impressed and would start a petition to give you some kind of medal for that.

Anyway. Vile language kinda comes with the whole 'impudence' thing, sooooo...

Yes, I did notice you had a theme going. I suppose it is a theme of the ill-bred youth of the world.

Yep. Goes back generations.

What can I say? I'm a traditionalist.

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[Audio] sob she can be such an asshole, I'm sorry

[Audio] Nooo, it's fiiiiine. XDD

[Audio] <333

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